The redeeming relationshipAs humans, we have a distinct way of living: the way we act and react to situations, the way we speak and interact with other humans. This sums up our various emotions, which are reflected in any relationship we find ourselves in. We frequently forget that we are the architects of our lives; we lay the groundwork and select the contents.Recently, I had a fight with a friend that was thought to be minor but turned out to be something we couldn’t have imagined, which gave me a horrible experience that I am only now recovering from.My friend perceived me to be a cheerful and playful but caring individual. My friend thought I was stupid because I love expressing my feelings, and whenever I am with him, he uses foul words that he knew I detested, and he behaves like an older person because he has a longer beard than I do. He is a manipulator, he doesn’t want to see anyone better than him, he is full of jealousy, and he makes me feel excluded. His attention was drawn to it, and I kept in mind that the need to always be right is a difficult thing for many people to give up.The need to be right in order to win an argument or settle a difficult matter may win the argument or settle the matter, but it often comes at the expense of a relationship.Unfortunately, he went rogue, said hurtful things, and called me names, prompting me to decide that I was done with him, but I needed to cool off first. Most of the time, saving relationships comes before being right.I know a lot of people who have broken up with someone like us, usually a parent or child, because someone is more concerned with being right than with being kind. Someone wants to be the judge, jury, and executioner of justice.What often happens is a breakup, which leads to years or a lifetime of hurt feelings, resentment, and no communication. In many cases, the disagreement was not even about a truly significant event–it was often about a difference of opinion. Looking back, it could all have been avoided and the relationship could have grown instead of ending if the person who insisted on being right had chosen kindness instead.”A kind word turns away wrath,” says Proverbs 15:1. Most people think of this in terms of how to calm down someone else.When a child is upset, parents are encouraged to speak softly and kindly so that the child can hear and feel our gentle spirit and calm down. This, I believe, works just as well on ourselves. When you’re angry and you want to be “right,” remember that you can defuse your rage by choosing kindness over wrath, mercy over justice.Allow me to be clear. I’m not suggesting you be a doormat, allowing all wrongs to go uncorrected. There are many situations where there is a clear right and wrong, and in those cases, you must side with what is right. I simply want you to think before you act and to be kind first.Examine your thoughts, words, and actions. Are you someone who has to be right all the time? What would others say about you if they were asked that question? Often, covering with kindness is the best way to win an argument or make a situation right.As I conclude, if you have the option of being right or being kind, always choose the latter.